There Are No Absolutes | Vol. 3
Vol. 3
Hey there,
Thanks for your grace in getting this email later on your Saturday. As you can see, the bike ride and breakfast was a success. And no, our family didn't magically grow by two kids...the neighbors joined us.
Ok, to this week's volume of The Weekly PRST...
The world doesn't operate in absolutes...at least not in my eyes. Rarely is there one "right" way to do something. Instead, there are usually different options and depending on your situation, beliefs, or personality one option may be more optimal or ideal than another. What's right for me may or may not be right for you and vice versa.
As a financial advisor, I've chosen to structure RLS Wealth in a certain way. You'll never catch me saying that my way is the only or best way to work with clients. If you didn't know, financial advisors love to debate and trash talk each other about the different business models that exist--it's pretty sad. I know tons of great advisors with businesses structured different than mine and they do a tremendous job for their clients, which is what really matters. I don't think I'm better or worse than those advisors--there is no "right" way to structure an advisory business--there are definitely wrong ways but that's not important for today.
PRST is built in a set of beliefs. These beliefs may be right for or resonate with some and not for others. My hope for PRST is that I am able to communicate in a way that is broad enough to allow the community to find what it needs to be able to incorporate more of their passions in their lives, yet direct enough to be helpful for those making the effort to follow their Pursuit.
For some, it might mean their passion ultimately becomes their career. For others, it might mean just finding some time for their passion as a hobby. And for others, it might even be as simple (yet it's hard) to figure out what they hell they are actually passionate about. Despite my wish that everyone could have their passion be their career, I know that's not always possible and maybe even not desired.
The constant theme is I believe finding and following your passions will ultimately lead to a happier and more fulfilled life with less regret. Whatever that looks to you, pursue it!
And keep pursuing.
Let's get to The Weekly PRST...
This Week's Top PRST
The most listened to and watched episode this week was On Our PRST with Duane Gordon Jr. Duane, or Originally Distinct, is an extremely talented creator--he's an artist, designer, rapper, and entrepreneur. His Pursuit led him from a career in real estate to full time creating as an artist. Tap in to learn about his journey and what he recommends for anyone looking to pursue their passions.
PassionRelationshipsSelfTime
Each week this section will consist of curated blog posts, articles, podcasts, videos, etc. that address Passion, Relationships, Self, and Time--the components of PRST.
P
“Passion comes after you put in the hard work to become excellent at something valuable, not before. In other words, what you do for a living is much less important than how you do it.”
- Cal Newport, So Good They Can't Ignore You
I ordered Cal Newport's book So Good They Can't Ignore You: Why Skills Trump Passion In The Quest For Work You Love after talking with another AGC member. When I first read the summary and some of the quotes, I felt uncomfortable. I don't believe Cal's take that you should abandon your passion, find something you are good at, and allow a passion for it to develop. Well, I should say I don't believe his take as an absolute. This may not be a fair assessment of the book but this was my first impression.
As I shared earlier, I don't believe in absolutes. I'll admit it is possible that a passion for one's work can develop the longer she spends doing it. But I know there are people like me for whom that will never work. Some of us are lead by passion. We just can't help it. If we don't get excited about what we are doing, then we'll never make it long enough to develop the passion as Cal suggests.
I don't believe you can force passion and I also don't think you can force passion to become something more than what it is supposed to be.
Here's my fear and beef with a book that has quotes suggesting following your passion is stupid: there is someone out there who needs to follow their passion--it is the guide for their Pursuit. When they come across the book, or similar quotes, doubt is put in their head, enough so they never give themselves a chance. Instead, they try to force themselves to become passionate about something they are good at but don't actually enjoy. No one should be denied the opportunity to explore and experiment with their passions to see where it takes them...look no further than some of the past guest of On Our PRST. Your passion CAN lead you to the life you want. It can also lead you to realize it is only supposed to be a part of your life, which is ok.
The reality is, like everything, the truth is probably somewhere in the middle---a little of both.
I'll have more commentary regarding the book after I read it. I'm excited to read it because it is a direct challenge to what I believe strongest. If you've read it before, I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts--it might be cool to have a virtual hangout session to discuss the book...not an official book club but in the spirit of one.
If you're interested in reading the book, you can grab it here. And if you're interested in an open-ended conversation, which maybe becomes a podcast or doesn't have to, hit reply and let me know.
R
As I continue to get used to having the ability to fill a more open calendar with phone calls and Zooms with friends, I have been reminded about how meaningful it is to have a network of great people--great is the right adjective, maybe exceptional is a better one. A few years back I'd have anywhere from 8-10 calls a week with other financial advisors to connect and talk shop. Most times the the advisor initiated the call but they were never the only one getting something out of the call--I often see people complaining about getting emails to have their brains picked and I can't understand the urge to take to social media to complain about being in a position where someone is seeking their knowledge. Maybe the complaints were meant to be humblebrags? I tried (and still do) to avoid saying no when someone reaches out to me.
First, I remember reaching out to some individuals in my profession who at the time were way more successful than I am today and they took time for me. If they were able to make time for me when I was finding my way, I can certainly do the same for anyone who thinks I can help them on their Pursuit.
Second, some of my closest friendships have come from answering those emails and having those calls.
So, I'll always keep time in my calendar for phone calls that have no agenda other than to meet someone new, answer some questions, and learn from each other--again, I always walk away from getting my brain picked gaining something...it's never been a waste of my time. Hopefully, in time some of these calls are solely Pursuit focused--this is subtle invite to do what my financial advisor friends have done over the years if you're on your Pursuit and need a little help.
There's a point to this, so stay with me 😀 ...
This week, I had multiple calls with friends that I hadn't talked with for awhile. I own this because it was mostly my fault as I was burning both ends of the candle for a year and I'm realizing in addition to sacrificing myself to make it all work, I was also sacrificing relationships I had built with amazing people. Most of these calls that were so meaningful to me this week were with members of The AGC, the online community I co-founded, along with the marketing queen for financial advisors, and a college buddy looking to start a new business idea. With the exception of the conversation with my college buddy, none of the conversations really centered around work--they were all personal, sharing what was going on in our lives, and what we were excited about. I cannot tell you how exciting and uplifting it is to hear about the successes of others--I know I can end up dominating conversations, especially once the conversation turns to what's going on with PRST but the good that is going on in the lives of my friends had me on Cloud 9 and energized.
If we spoke this week on the phone or via video, please know that our conversation was extremely valuable and meaningful on my Pursuit 😀.
By now, if you haven't skipped to the next section, you might be wondering, "what the hell does this have to do with me?"
Well, it is a reminder to take time to reconnect with the people in your life that maybe you haven't had the time for lately. You know who you should reach out to---it's whoever just popped in your mind. It's also a reminder that going on your Pursuit alone is a tough thing to do and I don't recommend it. If the people in your circle aren't supporting and pushing you forward on your journey, then it might be time to find a tribe more aligned with where you are in your life today. I talked about how sometimes we have to let people in our life go because your purposes in each other lives have run their course--it's tough to let go of people but it's important to understand that not everyone is meant to stay in your Pursuit forever, and that's ok.
It's a quick read and it's probably not going to teach you anything new but it will definitely remind you of some important things for you network or tribe. We don't ALWAYS have to learn when we read--reminders are just as good sometimes.
S
In Friday's episode of The PRST I talked about putting blinders on to keep from comparing yourself to others while you are on your Pursuit. I meant to mention this blog post from Lawrence Yeo in my conversation but I forgot, which is perfect because now I can introduce a new piece of content to you.
After one of those meaningful calls this week, my friend sent me the link to "The Game You Don't Need To Play" over on More To That.
"Status is one of humanity’s great poisons, but it’s so deeply engrained in our evolutionary makeup that we continue to drink from its fountain whenever we can. It’s an unsurprising fact that animals arrange themselves based on hierarchical power structures, but what’s surprising to me is how readily human beings follow that same behavior without much thought."
As I shared in the podcast, lately I've been having internal conversations and debate about the importance of status. I look to others sharing similar messages as PRST and the number of lives they are impacting and momentarily find myself a bit jealous and wishing I had the same platform--I truly believe the message and mission of PRST is that important. I'm not proud that I have those jealous thoughts but I'm thankful I'm aware enough to recognize them and shut them down. I remind myself that the goal of PRST is impact--to help as many people as possible find their way to a happier and more fulfilled life. There is no number attached to "as many as possible". If only ends up being one person, then PRST did what I set out to accomplish.
It's every easy to get caught up with status on your Pursuit---whatever that status looks like for you. It could be size of business, it could be number of followers (this is the worst), or anything else that you're using someone else as your benchmark. I encourage you to become more aware of when you find yourself letting status, or the progress of others, to become your benchmark and when you notice it, re-center your thoughts to your why and your own benchmark.
You're human. It's natural to look at others and judge yourself but just because it's natural for us to do it, we don't have to let it persist once we recognize what we're doing.
T
No comments...just sit with how this makes you feel.
From the Daily Stoic:
The Most PRST Book Ever
I've mentioned the book It's All In Your Head by the musician Russ out on social media and in the podcasts. It took me all of two evenings to read...it's a short book and a fun read. Plus, it is the most PRST thing I've ever read that didn't come from me.
I'll never to claim to own the idea of pursuing your passions, believing in yourself, taking a risk, and chasing the life that you truly desire. I'm also not the first to talk to you about the power of the Universe (or pick you Higher Power of choice), the laws of attraction, the impact optimism and mindset have on our lives, and that the life you're pursuing is actually closer than you think.
In this book, Russ shares how through his self-confidence, manifestation, and most important HARD WORK, he's been able to start his own music label, control all of his business ventures, provide for his family, do whatever he wants, and impact the lives of the hundred of thousands, if not millions, of fans.
As I was reading the book I thought to myself, "yep, I'm going to write a book one day." The tone, vibe, and message inspired me to let a book come to me one day--it won't be something I force, as I've got plenty of other PRST outlets to tap. But I want (and will) write a short, easy to read, and fun book helping readers on their Pursuit.
Why Read The Book?
Maybe you shouldn't. If it doesn't feel like something you're interested in reading, then let it pass. It might be meant for you to read at a different time of your Pursuit, which was what happened to me with The Alchemist.
One of the main reasons I think you should read the book is you can never see or hear enough personal stories of journeys to find, follow, and live out passions. Sometimes you need to hear those stories to see yourself in that person's story. Sometimes you need confirmation that the path you are on and the beliefs guiding you aren't crazy and do in fact work. And sometimes you just need to be inspired by someone else's excitement.
So, if you are at all intrigued, grab a copy to read. And if now doesn't seem like the right time, let it go. I'll be talking about it and eventually interviewing Russ on the podcast (you'll get to see manifestation happen in real life with this) that you'll still get the message.
Check out the appetizer email I sent earlier this morning for the song "Manifest" by Russ.
This Week Of PRST
The Daily PRST. In this week's episodes you'll:
Hear why you should support your friends ventures and pass on any discounts they may offer you. Pay full price!
Hear why sometimes you need to be impulsive on your Pursuit.
Remember to be thankful when you wake up each morning.
Learn why you have to be optimistic on your Pursuit.
Check out all of the episodes here.
The PRST. In this week's episode we I share my thoughts about why you should have blinders on when you're on your Pursuit but leave them loose enough to be able to see people, signs, or inspiration when needed. I talk out of both sides of my mouth but by the end you'll understand why putting your head down and blinders fully on may not be the best approach. You can find the episode here.
PRST Shorts. I finished getting enough film for the next short and need to record the conversation to provide the audio. We're probably a couple of weeks away from the next one. For now, get caught up on the first three Shorts.
On Our PRST. Tune in to hear from one of the most talented and creative people I've ever met. Duane Gordon Jr., aka Originally Distinct shares his Pursuit to becoming a full time artist creating physical art, digital art, a designer clothing brand, and even music. I know I always say this but his story is 100% PRST. Check out the episode here.
Something To Meditate On...
How will you live your precious life?
Keep Pursuing,
Justin
